Mary Magdalene was misunderstood. People judged her by how she looked and lived. But they couldn’t see her heart, her deep need for love and acceptance. Jesus did – He understood her.

Like Mary, I had the same aching need for someone to love me, need me, make me feel like I mattered. I went from one relationship to another, looking for my "soul mate".

By age 35, I was starting to feel desperate. That’s when I met Michael. He made me feel very special. He loved me and needed me, and he filled the emptiness inside me. So I married him.

But my husband was not the man he seemed to be. He was troubled and sick – and he dragged me down into his world of addiction, danger and fear. Despite his disappearances and suicide attempts – and many lies – I never stopped loving my husband. But I was a nervous wreck, anxious and worried all the time. I couldn’t sleep and could barely function in my job. All of my energy was focused on trying to help my husband, to “save” him. I didn’t have a relationship with Jesus back then – but I believed God was up there and I prayed a lot.

My marriage ended when my husband went to prison. I was exhausted – physically and emotionally. I even lost my job of 8 years. But the worst was behind me. I finally told my family the truth, and they were loving and supportive. Yet I still felt vulnerable and needy … so I turned to an ex-boyfriend for comfort.

It took me 2 years to get my life back on track. I went for counseling at a women’s clinic – and learned that it was OK to be angry with my husband, for abusing my trust, my love. I mourned the loss of my marriage and the life we could have had together. And I accepted the fact that my co-dependency had contributed to the disaster of my marriage.